This is All About My Bio and decision to go from male to female as a transsexual
From the age of 3 i knew i was born in the wrong body and wanted to be a girl.
i also was born with fetile alcohol sydrome witch caused me to learn slow and to warp my mind
you see somehow i pretend when my moms not around to pass the time as like im a admiral of a starship a queen of a nation
or more. im also so insecure i sleep with a pikachu (pokemon) and sleepy bear (travelodge bear)
as well as i keep a security binky under my pillow. (its old white tights that i made into my binky from the wee age of
like 3 or 4)
growing up my mom spoiled me as she wanted a son and got one however i was in my own ways not a son. i wanted to be me
a girl to make my body right with the world.
to keep me from getting outta trouble mom kept me on the nes and snes game systems by nintendo and i played em and never
thought about being a girl much untill my cousin (only girl in family at the time) came over then i would want to wear her
till this day mom keeps saying she didnt drink while being preg.
my mom was at the doctors and the doctors asked her.
you daughter Rita is in enviromental or hormonal that i wanted to be a girl.
my mother thought it was enviromental as i was taken care of by her and my sister for the longest time.
i started wearing my moms and sisters clothes from the age of 4 thru 14.
one time at the age of 12 my mom asked me why i wanted to be a girl. like a therapy session on the couch.
i didnt have a dad as he was in ohio and died when i was 12.
so from 14 to 18 i tried to hide my feelings and try to be normal but i still wasnt right.
you see my step brother decided to throw all my girl clothes away to try to make me normal and i lived without it till
1998 when i bought allot after i planned to go to australia.
then in 1998 i moved to autralia to be with my partner. i met her on the msn forum that was once free and from there we
her name was fiona.
from 1998 to 2001 we had a relationship that was loving. it was basically 2 loving lesbians.
i never had sex with her as i decided to have sex after my operation or what they call srs.
well in 2001 my sister in alaska her husband died and i was homeless from august 2000 to march 2001.
so i had a storage shed and my mom went to my best friend and said she needed 2 k to go there and to sell all Ritas stuff
as i wasnt coming home so he did.
so i lost 50k of stuff and she got to go to alaska.
mind you the story is fiona bought allot of the stuff at the time with her retirement money as we was gonna get her stateside
and we needed stuff.
well i returned home on help from the united states consulate and i tried to get answers on why my property was gone.
no luck. so in june 2001 i didnt hear from fiona and called her brother.
i called him july 14th and found out she commited suicide in a city park in melborune australia.
i blame myself more to this day as she let me have control somewhat of the money. witch was like $250k australian and
we blew it on games and fun.
i relize now if i had to do it all over i would of focused on srs and cosmetic surgery.
well since then its a curse with me.
i leaned my lesson the hard way.
from 2002 to 2003 since i am mentally disabled i fought with my sisters help to get on social security.
oh by the way in 1999 i started hormones and got off of them from july 2001 to aug 2003 and been on them since.
now as a disabled person i read how its going to be hard being transgendered and to transition
well with my mind i came up with a budget and will have everything cosmetically done by 2011 if i continue on the course
to all of my family i been excepted as Ritalee. my best friend doesnt know other then that im living as a girl 24/7 and
i been living full time since 1999 basically.
im slowly removing the hair but i heard there is a cream i can aquire to make hair removal painless. i will be discussing
it with my doctor in may on it.
i have a new therapist. all i can say is i like her. she is nice and she is a cutie and a hottie. some of the stuff i
express my feelings on i dont think she gets it.
i see her weekly and well 1 reason i made this site is to show people what im up against as a disabled person to get my
goal done to have a body i am confortable with.
now as for my therapist. i also made this so she can monitor and read and tell me when she isnt around what i can do to
make myself better or ect.
for the next few years this will be like my own online bio.
now for my worst fears i am affraid to be single and grow old alone. i always feel i might be gone before im 40 because
also on another note as im disabled i did try marriage agencys and they took my money. thats when i decided to be me and
get my transition done.
as for my lonelyness well i told my therapist. no one is gonna want a disabled person on social security because there
on a fixed income as well as no one since im lesbian is wanting a transgendered like me.